goddamn it, this is NOT IT.
It was supposed to inspire us. To leave the conference on our feet and on top of the world.
But to me it did the exact opposite.
The woman on stage “had it all”. “The American Dream.” She sold her company for $225M.
After her big sale, she was on Shark Tank, has new brand deals with giant companies like Botox (dont get me started about why this sucks to mention at a women’s conference where the average age is 40+) written books, and now is starting an entrepreneurship empire.
But we could all tell she wasn’t happy.
The undercurrent of her story was addiction. Addiction to business growth, to more more more, to fame and money and growth at all costs. She breezed over her 2 divorces, a high-schooler in rehab, her personal life obviously suffered. “I loved being there so much, I was there from open to close every day” she touts as she’s talking about opening her first location.
Now that she could do WHATEVER she wanted in life, she wanted to live on land and get chickens and go to spiritual retreats. (ahem, raise your hand if you have a version of this life already)
This choked me up. You poor thing. You could have had that life at any point along the way. Did you allow yourself to take a break? Did you know what kind of life you wanted? Did you give yourself permission to build that life? Did you put your worth in how successful your business was? (hello codependency) Do you feel like you still have to be productive now? Even though you could never work another day in your life?
I looked over at my best friend, Anna Cohen. We are CONSTANTLY talking about how amazing our lives are (by design). How grateful we are for our kids, our husbands, how spacious and magical our lives get to be. (by design) How we get to travel with our families, go on retreats, LEAD spiritual retreats, help people change the trajectory of their lives and are building our *pinch me* dream lives. We are living in our “sweet spots” (see below) (And no- we are nowhere near millionaires.)
This talk cracked me open. I cried and cried afterwards. No, not because I was moved or inspired. (unfortunately) In fact it was the exact opposite. I felt like I was struck by lightening into my purpose, even further than I already was.
So, picture me standing on some tall rock with a megaphone saying this, (a pep talk and reminder to myself and you, if it resonates.)
Growth for growth’s sake is not it. Work & life harmony is it. Building your dream life RIGHT NOW is it. Nursing barefoot in the grass on a Tuesday is it. Ease and freedom is it. Being worthy and beautiful right now is it. Whatever YOU want is it. Not my truth, not her truth but YOUR truth.
Every business has many sweet spots at which you can be profitable, pay yourself well, and take the time off you want. We just have to find that sweet spot. Just because a business is making $500,000, $1M, or 5M does NOT necessarily mean you get to have the life of your dreams. Because sometimes, mo’ money mo’ problems.
You do NOT need to grind your way to success. No amount of money is worth the things that matter to you. Your life is not on the other side of any growth metric or dollar amount. Your life is happening NOW and you get to choose how you want it to be!!
